Archive for ‘Science Jokes’

May 28, 2015

Just pretend it’s Tuesday, here’s a joke, or two, or three

by Janie Jones

Quantitative Chemical Analysis is how I am spending the first seven weeks of summer.  It’s like math camp for chemistry nerds.  It’s all about measuring chemical compounds and solutions to within insanely tight tolerances, and solving for the composition and concentration of unknowns using standardized chemicals.

I don’t think anyone actually enjoys it.  Not even the lab teacher.  She said she kinda hated it when she took it too.

This was in the front cover of my text book:chem cartoon textbook0001This is Janie in the first three labs:

a pinchQuestion asked right before lunch:  what is the common name for NaC2H3O2?

Did someone say nacho?  Is it Taco Tuesday in the cafeteria?  I could totally do nachos.

If you think this post is Fluorine Uranium Nitrogen Nitrogen Yttrium, click like.

April 2, 2015

Thursday Quote Du Jour: Pucker up, Buttercup

by Janie Jones

Kiss me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist, right?

miscellaneous quote from Google

I’m a scientist.  Dinosaurs as such are extinct.  According to the geologic record they vanished about 65 million years ago.

What happened, then, to the dinosaurs?

I’m a scientist Jim, not a paleontologist.

But that kinda depends on how you classify dinosaur.  Some evidence suggests dinosaurs evolved into birds, so one could arguably say, “Dinosaurs still exist but in the form of birds.”

But then, you could also stretch that argument and say, I had Kentucky fried T-Rex last night or an Allosaurus omelet this morning.

funny-dinosaur-evolution to chicken dinner

And in which case, I see a flock of dinosaurs every time I visit Leif on the farm.

Reality check, if you can call a Gallup poll reality:

According to a 1993 Gallup poll, 3% of 18-29 year olds and 2% of responders who never went to college believe that dinosaurs still exist.  On the other hand, apparently 16% of 65+ year olds believe dinosaurs are a myth.

I have no idea what this post means.  It started with a funny quote and it will end with pet burial and aliens.

Dinosaur Cartoon buy pets

 

 *images from Google funny images of dinosaurs search

 

 

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April 1, 2015

Happy April Fool’s Day

by Janie Jones

I don’t really enjoy pranks.  I’m too old, too tired, and I have just one straw left.  In my condition April Fool’s pranks take too much valuable effort to plan, and being on the receiving end could very well throw me into the whole Cameron Frye catatonia.

I thought about ignoring the whole fact it was April Fool’s Day, and telling you all about the very, very strange dream I had which started as an alien encounter while scuba diving and ended as the sinking of the Titanic 18 hole golf course cruise ship (?!?!?!) but figured on account of it begin April Fool’s Day you wouldn’t believe it was a real dream, and any way I’m too tired to type any more about anything this morning.

My arthritis is not playing April Fool’s jokes.  I have a very real pain in the neck that I woke up with and it hurts.

So here’s a couple cartoons:

completelygoofy science april fools day

And while I appreciate the science-y theme prank ideas, this one is a little more Everyman:

peanuts-auction

 

May your day be as prank-full or prank-less as you please.

March 31, 2015

Tuesday Titters: I love science, don’t you?

by Janie Jones

If the comics are too small clicking on them will enlarge…

I'm surprised more people don't like science cartoon
Yeah I love science cartoon

Now excuse me, I have to go count a few billion bacteria…

March 26, 2015

Thursday quote du jour has been preempted in favor of jam session

by Janie Jones

We don't play heavy metal

February 17, 2015

Tuesday titters: microscopic humor

by Janie Jones

Why did the bacteria cross the road?

To prove he wasn’t chicken?

Nah, he was just stuck to the chicken’s butt.

***

What do you call an amoeba that crosses the road, jumps in a mud puddle and crosses the road again?

A dirty double-crosser.

bacteria is staph

December 16, 2014

Tuesday Titters: This physics final will likely defy rhyme and reason

by Janie Jones

Today is the day.  My physics final begins at 7:30 am.  I am both petrified and relieved.  If I pass, I move on to physics 2 in the spring.  If I fail, I’ll have to revisit physics 1.

Here’s hoping my sad math brain doesn’t fail me.  Hopefully my humor won’t either…

rhyme or reasonlimit equations my favorite frequency V equals D divided by TI think if I understand enough to find these jokes funny, that should be all the physics I need.  I think I deserve an A, don’t you?

But, I’m definitely more a glass is half empty kinda person.

optimist pessimist physicist

And I’m pretty sure my final will resemble this:

bad physics answers
I am not going to cite all these cartoons.  It’s obvious I didn’t make them, I’m not taking credit for making them, in fact, I blantantly stole them from Google images.  Some other more brilliant person deserves credit for sure, but if you want to know who you can research the more appropriate citations by clicking here.