Ooooh, that hurt

by Janie Jones

So, last night after a somewhat late training meeting at work, I was getting into the car, happy the meeting got done early and eager to get home and into bed.  As I called goodbye over my shoulder to a coworker, I pulled the car door open, an activity I’ve done thousands upon thousands of times in my car driving years.

For some reason, this time was different.

As I turned back to the car, suddenly something pointy smacked right into my left cheekbone.  I might have cried out, I’m not really sure.  It happened very fast and I was taken completely by surprise.

Through the haze of shock, pain and wonder, I  realized it was the one sharp point on the whole door.   I had managed to simultaneously turn into it as I pulled the door open.  Then, all I could do was laugh.  Well, it was either that or cry; it hurt really badly.

The coworker, who didn’t actually see what happened was very alarmed and came running over asking what happened.  I gave a somewhat hysterical and jumbled explanation while gasping from laughter over my stupidity and unusual level of clumsiness.  And she reassured me I wasn’t bleeding, but even in the dim light of the parking lot she could see a bruise already forming.

Feeling like an idiot I said, “Now people will think I’ve been in a bar fight.  They will have a whole different opinion of me now.”

She laughed with me and asked if I was going to be okay.  As I wasn’t bleeding, I had to presume I was, or would be, once I got over the embarrassment and affront to my dignity.  But, I tell you what, that really smarted.  All the way home.  Back at the house, and then I finally feel asleep to the stinging throb of my poor face.

Last night there was a roughly quarter-sized red welt with few ruptured capillaries visible.  I applied my favorite all purpose topical cream, Preparation H, to keep the hemorrhaging down and hopefully help numb the pain.  And, let me tell you, that stung, boys and girls.

This morning the welt is a little angrier looking, but still mostly red.  No black and blue.  And, it now it mostly feels tight from the swelling, as long as I don’t bump or touch the area.  I tried to take a photo, but the light washes out the ugliness, so you will just have to imagine me with a big red bump under my eye.

I don’t really know whether or not to be glad it’s not black and blue, as it is, now it sort of resembles a giant, headless zit.

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