Tuesday Titters

What kind of fruit do ghosts like best?

BOO-berries!

I just have to share the good news

News Flash:  Janie Jones got a 91% on her Organic Chemistry test Friday.

Hip–HIP–HOORAY!

There hasn’t been a whole lot of goodness around Jones-ville lately so I’ll groove on this bit of cheer for as long as I can….

Tuesday Titters

What do you call a skeleton that doesn’t like to work?

A lazy bones

What do you call a ghost wearing a torn up old sheet?

A holy terror

Seeing as this week we’ve already broached the topic of Genpop intelligence…

At the local grocery I cruised past the meat department.  As I was wavering over the cost of a spiral cut ham I noticed that someone had written in those special grocery store markers on the glass of the seafood counter in big “fancy” sign script:

Supereme!

I was seriously tempted to ask for a pound of their “Supereme” Jumbo Shrimp.  Not any old supreme shrimp, only your SUPEREME shrimp for my family thank you.

I guess that’s what you get when you stop teaching phonics and sounding out words in school.

While we’re on the topic of misspelled signage, I forgot to mention a few weeks ago I took Rupert to have his toenails cut.  There’s a doggie daycare/groomers down the way a bit from school and they do it quickly and inexpensively, which saves me the worry of clipping too short and making him bleed.  As I stood and waited I read some of the signs and notices posted around the counter.  This particular one caught my eye:

If we are not at the counter, we are probably in back assisting our 4 legged customers in the groomer’s area.  Your business is important to us, so please wait here and we’ll be back soon.  Thank you for your patients.

Now if they were a veterinary office I might giggle at the play on words.  But in this case it just made me shake my head.

Thursday Quote Du Jour #12: How you spin it makes all the difference in the world

Leif has been reading up on making beer.  There’s some interesting chemistry going on, so while I’m not much of a beer drinker, learning about the process is interesting from a scientifically clinical point of view.

I don’t remember how the conversation began but Leif said the following, which, while hysterical and may make you think twice, is totally true:

So, basically yeast eats sugar, poops alcohol and farts CO2.  So, sparkling wine?  Basically yeast poop and farts.

Yumm!  I so totally want to go spend $100+ on some fancy French yeast poop and fart Champagne.

Not being much of an alcoholic beverage drinking gal was sounding pretty good right about then.  Until that is, it occurred to me that yeast farts are what make bread rise.  Damn tasty yeast farts.

Sublimation of the Genpop Intelligence Quotient

I don’t pay a whole lot of attention to the news.  It depresses me.  Many of you might find my attitude despicable, but I have more than enough misery to contend with in my immediate circle without having to broaden my horizons to include the county, state, nation, and world’s misery, too.

Anyway, the point is, apparently some brain trust put “dry ice” bombs in LAX the other day.  Chem Prof heard of this and had to ask if we’d seen a particular news cast describing the event.  I am expecting some interesting chemistry related discussion about the making, exploding, etc of a dry ice bomb.  Apparently it was pretty boring.  Just dry ice and probably some hot water in a 2 liter soda bottle, which is enough to make the bottle explode as the sublimation of the dry ice creates C02 gas.  What Chem Prof found more interesting, and irritating, was the news caster described this process as dry ice “melting.”

To which I had to logic bomb, “But if they actually said sublimating, 90% of the population probably wouldn’t have a clue what that means.”

He stopped, nodded and agreed that was, indeed likely to be quite true.

See, just one more reason not to bother with the news.  It simply is wrong.  Dispensing misinformation is a sign of the times.

Well that was a nice surprise

So apparently that small fortune in textbooks I bought off Amazon entitled me to a credit for $3 in free music downloads.  I’m not a huge audiophile, but hey, free is free, and I wasn’t about to let it go to waste.

After thinking about how to redeem my whopping $3 credit, I finally decided on two songs I just had to have once I realized they were available.  First, I had to have Carly Simon’s You’re So Vain, just because I love the opening :

“You walked into the party, like you were walking onto a yacht. 

“Your hat strategically dipped below one eye, your scarf it was apricot.” 

I mean, not only do I love that powerful image it conveys, but seriously, what kind of song writing genius does it take to rhyme yacht with apricot?  Anyway, I’ve listened to it about a million times since then.

I also got myself the Gilmore Girls theme version of Carole King’s Where You Lead I Will Follow.  If you’re not a fan of Gilmore Girls, I just don’t know what to say to you.  But, if you also don’t like this song, or don’t think it’s fun and happy and gives you warm fuzzies, well you must be an alien.  In case you hadn’t already guessed, I loved the show, and we always had to tune in in time for the theme song so I could sing along (probably very badly) with remote standing in as a mic (looking like a huge dork no doubt).  Without a doubt, Gilmore Girls night was always the best night of the week, and singing that theme song was good times.  And, if you believe I’ve listened to You’re So Vain a million times, you can easily guess I’ve listened to Where You Lead about a billion.  It’s my new talisman +4 against feeling sad.

Can you burn out a track on your MP3 player?