Have you ever woken up on the wrong side of the hour?

by Janie Jones

My alarm clock has two alarm settings.  So, you can have one setting for “Oh crap it’s early” and a different one set for “Are-you-out-of-your-friggen-mind?!?-Why-did-you-even-bother-to-go-to-bed early.”  After I finished school I reset the earlier of the two for a later time, something more along the lines of a respectable not to early and not too late but a “Well-I-really-should-get-up-at-a-reasonable-hour-and-get-some-stuff-done” hour.

This morning I didn’t need to leave for any of my appointments until 9ish, so upon going to bed last night I turned on the alarm clock for what I thought was going to be 7 am so I could have a couple hours to do laundry, my chiropractor prescribed stretches, and, of course, blog.  However, when the alarm went off I thought, “Cheesy Pete! It can’t possibly be 7 yet.  I’m still sooooo tired.”  So I hit the snooze alarm a few times before dragging my sore, groggy ass from bed.  I turned on my laptop and while it powered up I stumbled down to the basement to put in my first load of laundry.  Upon returning to my room I peered myopically at my laptop and noticed it was already 7:30.

“Crap.”  I thought to myself.  “Crap, crap, crappity crap.  Guess I’ll have to skip blogging again today.”  Then I scuffled into the bathroom to put in my contacts and noticed the larger clock on the vanity.

“Wait.  That doesn’t say 7:30. ”

I leaned down and squinted, willing those pesky numbers to come into focus.


I quick ran and checked the huge red LED digital readout on my alarm clock.

“Crap, crap, crappity crap!  I set the wrong alarm.”

So, I got up an hour early.  No wonder why I was so tired.  Well, heck, I’m going  back to bed.

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