Archive for January 17th, 2012

January 17, 2012

Tuesday Titters: Week 3

by Janie Jones

As it is the first day of class at Stickittoyou University this morning and it is cold and dark I thought this joke would be appropriate.

Newton’s First Law of Motion translated by the average student:  a body at rest will stay at rest under a down comforter until forced to move.

I’ve been looking up science jokes in honor of changing my major, so while you all may have been feeling relief at my relinquishing holiday jokes for the new year you can now take comfort in knowing I’ll be torturing you with physics, chemistry and biology jokes.

I’ve been getting some flak about my lame jokes.  I feel that the lamer they are the funnier they are.  Hey, that’s just the way my lame sense of humor rolls.  But apparently I have fans.  From the spam queue last week:

Whoa, most of these jokes are hilarious! Continue to keep including more please. I really enjoy these. Very funny…

Well, thank you Joseph Krikorian at  Most of my fans think you’re just spam, but I believe you really appreciate my humor.  So just for you, this Tuesday we’ll have a two for one on lame jokes:

An anion walks into a bar after a tough day.  He sees an attractive anode sitting at the end of the bar and hopes his luck is about to change.  The bartender, a cation,  comes up to him.

Bartender:  Hey, tough day, huh?  You’re looking pretty negative.

Anion:  I’m hoping I’m about to charge my luck.  Say, is that anode here with anyone?

The bartender shakes his head:  She’s pretty attractive, but she’s not your type.

The anion asks:  Are you sure?

Bartender:  Hey, I’m positive.

Happy Tuesday.