And sometimes the Universe gives you a huge neon sign saying, “Don’t go there!”

I can take a hint.  Really.

So, I have to accept that I’m just not supposed to take this classics class.  I’ve tried to sign up for it now for 4 different terms and for one reason or another I’ve never been successful.  I thought (and this is apparently where I always get into trouble…) that this summer I finally succeeded.  I was looking forward to it even.  And then…

Apparently the U.S. government body that makes decisions about college grants said, “Hmn.  Times is tough.  We needs to cut back.  Let’s not offer Pell Grant money in the summer no more.”

And, so now I must drop classics because I can’t afford to pay out of pocket for the course.

My summer is suddenly seeming very empty.  And, that my friends must be the silver lining.  Sometimes Fate does favor fools and unemployed-work-a-holic-crazy-single-mom-pushing-40-students.

Well, will wonders never cease

So, I got an email from one of my congress persons today. Or rather, I should say I got a [form] letter from my congress person’s blue dressed intern or assistant. It read like this:

January 20, 2012

Dear *Ms. Jones:

Thank you for contacting me about the Protect IP Act. I appreciate hearing from you and especially appreciate hearing the concerns you have raised.

On January 20th, 2012, Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid announced an indefinite postponement of the scheduled Senate vote on the Protect IP Act. As Congress continues to consider this issue, please know that I will work to make sure your concerns are addressed.

The internet has dramatically altered the manner in which we communicate, conduct business, seek entertainment and find information. It is vital to ensure that online innovation and openness are preserved so the American people can continue to freely to express themselves and pursue personal and economic endeavors over the internet.

It is also important that foreign criminals not be allowed to steal the property of others without consequence. The pirating of intellectual property is not a victimless crime. Rather, it threatens the jobs and livelihoods of millions of middle class American workers and businesses. However, we must seek ways to protect people from online piracy, particularly foreign piracy, without limiting web-based innovation or a free exchange of ideas.

Again, thank you for taking the time to contact me. One of the most important parts of my job is listening to what the people of [my state] have to say to me. I am here in our nation’s capital to do the public’s business and to serve the people of our state. I hope you will contact me again about matters of concern to you.

Sincerely,

[Senator's Name]
United States Senator

*Names and places have been changed to maintain my blogging identity mystique. Great word, that: mystique. Although, I wasn’t much impressed with Mystique as an X-men character. But, I digress.

So, I really just wanted to shake my virtual finger at all you foreign criminals out there and say, “Stop stealing from our Great American Internet.” You know, it is rumored that Al Gore invented the internet, snipe hunting and pants. It’s obvious to see that pants wearing snipe hunters have the legitimate rights to internet ownership and it’s all you foreigner’s faults that our pants wearing snipe hunters may have to take their internet and go home. Think of all the poor middle class Americans you are victimizing!!!!

*Gasp* Sob! *Cluck*

Foreign Intellectual Property Pirates. There has to be a really funny joke in that, but it’s probably already someone else’s intellectual property so I couldn’t share it here anyway.

One silver lining though, if you can believe a word of what any politician says, the PIPA act vote has been indefinitely postponed. I bet someone on Capitol Hill realized that if this act was passed they wouldn’t be able to get at their porn. Porn saves the day!!!!

SOPA/PIPA Compliance

I am going to beat this dead horse until it’s cat food quality pate.

I imagine it’s a dead horse, because the day I posted “SOPA sucks”  My stats took a huge dive.  Only three of you were brave enough to check me out.  I don’t blame you, my temper tantrums are ugly and saying I disagree with THE MAN probably gets me the wrong kind of attention from You-Know-Who.  But despite the chripy quality of Wednesday’s blog I’m tenaciously going to post about SOPA and PIPA again.

I needed to clean out my media files anyway, so in a moment of pique, I started tossing any photo I didn’t take myself, recklessly regardless of broken links in past posts and accidentally getting carried away and deleting a few things I didn’t have to.  Then, however, I got to my CowaBunger award and I went weak.  I can’t delete my beautiful corn cow.  But, I decided I could only partially plagiarize by reproducing the award using my impressive Photoshop* skills.  Hey, I paid in excess of $1500 to be taught how to use it, I might as well get some return on my investment.

So:  voila!

Without further ado I present the all new and improved Janie Jones and her partially SOPA compliant blog.

Or for those of you who already noticed my new header, the More Boring than Ever Janie’s Place in the Great White North where I will spend the next month being a general poopy butt about this whole SOPA thing.

*This should not be perceived as any kind of endorsement for Photoshop.  And, in case you were born in a vacuum, I was speaking tongue in cheek about my skills….

SOPA sucks

I’d like to say I have a lot to say on this subject.  But I’m not very eloquent in that way.  Politics get me so riled up that any calm and rational expression of thought is impossible.  Perhaps you may not realize this but underneath Janie’s lame joke telling demeanor is a seething roiling mass of stressed out depressed rage.  Blogging is my therapy.  Right now I’m going to indulge in a little therapy.

AAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGG!!!!!

Excuse me.  You may not want to keep reading if you wish to avoid Janie’s temper tantrum.  I haven’t had a good one on this blog in a while, so it may be shocking to some readers.

That said, if SOPA is as bad as it sounds, I’d likely be in deep shit.  My avatar after all is probably someone’s copyrighted photo.  I have long meant to replace it with a mock up photo of me as Rosie, but that requires me to have someone available to take my photo when I’m available to get all dressed up.  And, on the occasions when the stars align and that is actually possible I tend to forget being as formerly it was not much of a matter of life and death.

Perhaps I deserve to hang for “borrowing” some photos over the years.  If I can tell where they’re from, I try to give credit, but I never knowingly borrowed anyone’s words without giving credit.  Can jokes you heard in 5th grade from some kid whose name you forgot be considered copyrighted material?  And, I just don’t get how it’s wrong if you refer someone to YouTube, or another site.  But, who am I?  Just someone who could be considered photo plagiarist myself.

And, while I’m on my soap box, I’d just like to say for the record, I’m damn sick and tired of hearing nothing but crap from our government.  Solyndra Scandal, Gunwalker Scandal, and then you can’t trust the police anymore.  How many stories have we heard lately about police brutality?  I didn’t vote for this.  I didn’t, and don’t support our Golfer in Chief.  Obama must go in 2012, but who do we have worthy to replace him?  Decent men, or women, are hard to come by.  Of what I’ve heard so far Herman Kane was probably the best candidate.  I suspect this is true because look how hard the media tried to discredit him.  He was a threat to the Liberal Agenda.  He had to go at all costs.  Well, we’ll never know now.  Instead we have to live in fear of losing other potentially good candidates to fixed polls and media slander.

Did I mention how much I hate sauerkraut!?!  (1)  Whoops, I mean politics.  I HATE POLITICS.  Yes, I used all caps.  Unapologetically.  I’m yelling now, just you can’t hear it because this is a blog.

Eh.  I’m to busy to worry about it.  Perhaps I’m to busy even to have a blog.  Perhaps that’s exactly what the gov’ment wants, people to be to busy their oblivious or so afraid they’ll give up speaking.

I’m going to go do some yoga now before I explode.  Then I suppose I’ll try hard to bury this in my “save for later when you aren’t already stressed out beyond belief” files so I can continue on with my life.  Probably not the best attitude, but I have all I can handle on my plate right now.

(1)  Reference to the Weird Al Yankovic song, Albuquerque.  There, I didn’t plagiarise I gave credit where due.

Now we’re getting somewhere-sort of

Cool beans! Got my college acceptance letter.

Unfortunately, they are making me take two years of foreign language and intermediate algebra. *Errrrrr* I think I have a lot to say, but I’m just going to hold my tongue.

So now I just have to set up a meeting with an adviser, register for classes, and file for financial aid.

Baby steps of progress are being made.

However, I do think I should be able to complain to some person of influence at the county/state. My social services councilor sends me this poorly worded form letter saying I make too much money on unemployment to qualify for medical assistance. That alone is a rant I could wax on for some time, but I’ll restrain myself, as my fingers don’t want to do that much typing. However, in the bottom of this retarded form letter, there is a statement which defies grammar and sense.

Comments:
(Name spelled wrong)
You are over for our health care by $169 – you need – a bill to open your case thru us for over $169 – you can reapply at that time – but you need a bill first and then you will need to reapply——-
You are ineligible for (state abbreviation) care – as you have to have no other insurance for 4 months – so in February – you can request an application and send it to (state abbreviation) care – but they will need verification that your other health insurance ended on 10/31/10
You are denied – once you get a medical bill over the / $169 – you can reapply at that time.
(worker name)/intake

Now I ask you, does this sound like a clear letter written by someone who’s job description requires a 4 year college degree? What the f&@k is with all the dashes and slashes? And is it mentally impossible for this person to complete a grammatically correct sentence?!? Perhaps it is like a telegram.

You are a *stop*
blooming retard *stop*
How did you*stop*
Get your degree *stop*
And how dare you *stop*
try to make me feel *stop*
like I am a burden *stop*
on our government *stop*

Huh.

So apparently the county/state would rather wait until I’m deathly ill then have me apply for insurance. At that point I would be put on a state medical assistance program that would get stuck paying 100% of everything over $169. However, if they let me start on an actual state insurance plan, I could pay a monthly premium plus a copay for services.

How exactly is that a fiscally responsible government plan?

And the Democrats are trying to ram government health care down our throats? The existing programs don’t even work. What makes anyone think a federal program would be better?!?

Oh well. I guess I’m waiting 4 months. Good thing I’m not going blind quickly. Or requiring regular monthly medications.

Tuesday is trash day. How apropos.

An ironic conversation from earlier:

Leif: What’s today? Monday?

Janie: Uh, yeah.

Leif: Okay, I thought so. We can’t forget to take out the trash.

Janie: Yeeeah.

Leif: Ha! We get to take out the trash twice in one day.

Janie: Heh. Yah. Let’s hope so.

Hope and change. Just not quite the way the “C-I-C” had originally in mind.

Here’s to a big whopping cup of tea with your ballot. Happy voting.